There was cheers of joy, and mouths full of spit and no teeth, today in the village of Abbeyfeale as 38 year old Kevin Higgins finally completed his primary education, becoming the first Limerick man to do so.
There was a celebrity reception for the ‘brainbox’ and a parade is expected to throng through the streets of the town later this week in his honour.
Already the man’s achievements have become a sore point in the shoebox town as many locals now think Mr Higgins is "full a himself", an "edyacated fooleen" and "too good for us".
Limerick’s smartest man is now expected to go on to great things like secondary school and such.

"Maybe even an aul Fash shcheme or sumtin’ like that. Or a GMIT coursheen, hi,” stated the master of the English language.
Story courtesy of Galway Daily News.