I live with five lads. I am the only female housemate and while there may be pros and cons to not having a girl in the house with me, I can, at least, say there is never a dull moment.
They may not be able to help me with my tan for a night out, but I don’t think I’d trade them for anything. Here are the three topics that most conversations revolve around in a house full of lads.
So, FIFA 15 has been released to all you vultures, time to say goodbye to your women, your family and sunlight for the next week or so. I really can’t understand how you spend so much time making little digital men run around a green screen, but in saying that, I challenge any lad out there to beat me on my FIFA knowledge. From Sturridge’s “wave” celebration and Facebook apologies, to the most popular “4-2-3-1” formation and tense penalty shoot-outs, I’ve seen it all and am now expert. And no I don’t need you to explain the offside rule to me, either. To any girl out there living with a lad, be it a platonic college roommate or a boyfriend, I’m sure you feel the same.
2. Women, obviously
I’ll probably get nothing but abuse for this, but for all the leery cries of “body on your wan!”, “serious hoop” and the approving “get in my son!” after they’ve pulled a “serious bird”, it seems that at the back of it all, they do actually respect a girl who has respect for themselves. But, at the minute, they’re just not looking for that kind of commitment. Not to mention effort. Having spent time with them chatting about women in general, not only do I now appreciate an unbelievable looking girl (especially if she squats), but you get a great insight into how their mind actually works when it comes to sizing up a woman. Both her looks and her personality (believe it or not!). They do pay attention girls, give them some credit.
3. LAD Humour
Ah LAD humour, one of life’s simple pleasures. The most important thing I have learned in my time living with the boys is that “your mother” is a perfectly acceptable comeback to absolutely any argument and will inevitably get a giggle or two no matter what the conversation was about. The best thing about lad humour? Complete insensitivity. Literally anything that can and will be said, no matter how offensive! They really don’t give a s**t. You don’t take offence and it’s all in the name of banter.