Hi everyone! Welcome to The Late Late Toy Show liveblog. I have absolutely no idea how this is going to go.
Follow me on Twitter: @conormcmahon.
What now? Oh, that's right, Christmas shopping… #LateLateToyShow— Her.ie (@Herdotie) November 29, 2013
11.43pm: Well, that's it folks! Thanks for reading. That's one pre-Chrimbo event out of the way. Wewhew! Now, here comes the Late Late memes...
11.42pm: I know I'm usually a cynical bastard, but in fairness, this has probably been the most rehearsed Late Late Toy Show. You win this time Tubs.
11.40pm: Almost it, he says. Almost the end kids, way past your bedtime.
"It's actually sweat". Cheers for clearing that up Ryan, thought you were oozing pure charisma. #LateLateToyShow— Giles Brody (@GilesBrody) November 29, 2013
11.34pm: Ah, the older they get, the more backchat they give. Bless.
11.28pm: The best moment so far...?
11.27pm: THANK GOD.
11.26pm: PLEASE don't let the real One Direction show up...
There'll be no one let stay up for the Toy Show if ye don't stop messing. Now get into yere pyjamas while the ads are on.— irishmammies (@irishmammies) November 29, 2013
11.19pm: I'm beginning to slowly hate this audience with all their free gifts...
11.18pm: Mary G is a cool little girl.
11.13pm: Does that dress Kate Middleton book include the topless photo? Let's hope not!
11.11pm: Why do they make them wear their uniforms? It makes it 10 times more cringier says @ellie_molly.
11.08pm: This thing just got...urban?
11.05pm: Is it just me, or is there an increase in culchies on this year's show? A good thing if you ask me (a Kildare man).
11.04pm: Tubs keeps forgetting whether he's the guest or the presenter. And whether it's day or night. Kid fatigue.
11.02pm: Another ad break, another breather.
11.01pm: Keep Minnie Mouse's skirt down, Tubs.
10.58pm: There's always one (the silent one).
10.57pm: That kid did well to gather his rattle nerves and chat to Robbie.
10.49pm: That was strangely Jimmy Kimmelyish.
10.47pm: Was that Ryan Seacrest thing a joke? No? Oh. Okay then.
Cup song! OMG!— Conor Hallahan (@conorhallahan) November 29, 2013
10:34pm: Ad break. Phew!
10:33pm: They avoided the usual traffic jam. Usually there's some wee one picking their nose, oblivious to their surroundings. Just like real life.
10:31pm: Fergal is CLUTCHING the sh*te out of his queue cards. Should be GAA commentator. Great lad.
@AllanCavanagh his groin is strangely hypnotic— Sean Moncrieff (@SeanMoncrieff) November 29, 2013
10.25pm: SIX year old harpist? Ah here...
10.22pm: That was actually pretty intimidating. Nice rap Rihanna!
10.18pm: That Rihanna one has got sass.
10.16pm: Okay, I didn't care about the gun thing, but I really want that Fujifilm thingy...
10:13pm: It's always great when they put the smallest one behind the drums.
10.10pm: Did Tubs say "two baps"? First innuendo of the night.
10:08pm: Well, the jumper reveal was (naturally) an anti-climax. Farming expert? They're always gas!
10.04pm: Ad break. Thank God. Twitter is EXPLODING.
10:01pm: Now that Liberty insurance have pulled sponsorship, Tubs is free to advertise the AA.
10.00pm: That's probably the first time a flying toy has actually flown in the studio in the history of the Toy Show.
9.57pm: The cute factor has been turned up to 90. Nothing melts the heart like a group of kids that all have missing teeth and lisps.
9.54pm: SANTA (the real one).
9.50pm: How many drinks are you supposed to take when Tubs can't handle the cheeky child?
9.48pm: Those kids never got their tails docked.
9.44pm: "Rashers and Sausages" the pigs. Good woman Aoife. What a legend.
9.42pm: So much for Gaybo's Super Soaker. Tubs is launching torpedos into the audience.
9:42pm: That's not a jumper?? Tubs is shaking like mad.
8.00pm: Sh*t, maybe I should have liveblogged Alan Hughes' effort instead: It's a mear 30 minutes long and the Toy Show lasts for a mammoth two-and-a-half-hours.
7.29pm: I wonder if I should catch TV3's 'Christmas Toys'? But I think it might just be an incredible waste of time (and beer).
7.12pm: #toyshowmemories is trending on Twitter right now.
6.45pm: My mate Vicki has some sound advice: "Never accidentally tune in to the Toy Show on Babestation, completely different thing."
6.39pm: There's still three hours to go before the show actually starts and I've already accidentally deleted this entire article FOUR times. Feck.
6.15pm: @rob_moro has suggested I play a certain "game". Hmmm...
5.24pm: Very early to start blogging, but I thought I'd give you the Late Late lowdown anyway.
This year's Toy Show (Tubs's fifth) has a record number of participants, with over 231 performers, demonstrators and kids taking part. The show will feature 237 toys and 100 toys will be used in the set design.
This year's theme is 'Mary Poppins'. Earlier this evening, Tubs told the Indo that he's very nervous about tonight's performance. “Normally I’m fine about the show," he said, "but this time I’ve added pressure because of course there’s suggestion that I try to sign and dance for you all. That’ll be interesting to say the least.” So maximum humiliation all round. Brilliant.