digesting the news so you don’t have to. Here are five things you should pretend to know about this miserable Tuesday.

Mammy’s boy

A parenting survey has shown that a third of mothers secretly have a favourite child. The survey, conducted by, has shown that 34 per cent of mothers and 28 per cent of fathers admitted to preferring one of their children over the others. Don’t worry, it’s not you – sure aren’t you the one that went on to third level makin’ the family proud?

Taoiseach threat

It has been revealed that An Garda Síochána has investigated a threat to shoot Taoiseach Enda Kenny. A man was questioned by gardaí in Mayo after posting a threatening comment to Facebook last Wednesday. The message was posted on the ‘Save the Sacred Heart Hospital Castlebar’ page and read: “If they close this hospital I’ll shoot Enda Kenny JFK assassination style.” Castlebar Town Council member Ger Deere told the Irish Sun that “the comment was a very serious one and we felt it should be passed on to the gardaí. It crossed the line.” A file is now being prepared for the DPP. No word from Enda, but he must feel like he’s starring in the Wesht Wing.

Maths mix-up

The State Examinations Commission confirmed this morning that a mistake on the Leaving Cert Maths Paper II at higher level. A geometry question featured a diagram of a triangle with an extra degree of one angle. This meant that it was possible to get two correct answers. Surely that calls for extra marks?

Steamy Shatter

A reprint of Justice Minister Alan Shatter’s racy 1989 novel Laura is being rushed out by published due to high demand from bookshops. The publication date was originally scheduled for late July or early August, but publishers Poolbeg have brought the date for the new edition to June 28. The book was a bestseller in 1989. The novel tells the story of an affair between a TD opposed to abortion and his secretary Colette. The book includes a steamy sex scene in the fictional TD’s Leinster House office – every woman’s fantasy.

That’s it

And finally, there is not much pretending in this story. Bring in the turf – Met Éireann’s rainfall radar has confirmed that the summer is over…for the next while at least. “Persistent and locally heavy rain” has been predicted through the midlands, north and east, which will clear northwest as the day progresses. It will be drier in the south and southwest, but there are heavy rainfalls forecast in the south and west later. Temperatures will be 16 to 19 degrees so get some wear out of the shorts while you still can.