Danielle Stephens explains the six stages of exam freak outs we all experience this time of year.

Denial

You’re lying. It’s still Easter. I still have some Easter egg left. I have nearly four more weeks, including weekends and all of that. I don’t have to think about exams for ages. Besides, when I do have to contemplate them, I won’t be stressed. No, I will be perfectly prepared, because I learned my lesson from last year.

Pain and guilt

Why??? Why didn’t I start studying before? I had so much time, where did the weeks go? It's all my fault and I’ll be so angry with myself if I don’t do well, or God forbid fail. I can hear my mother already “Imagine what result you might have gotten if you had applied yourself”. The shame!

Anger

Everyone in my house is against me; they don’t seem to get that I need it to be absolutely quiet for me to get anything done. Oh of course, my friend would have to have her birthday this weekend, when I need to learn everything from my entire semester. Why are so many funny memes being posted on Facebook? It’s like people want me to fail.

Bargaining

If I study through Grey’s Anatomy, I should be allowed take a break for Game of Thrones. I’m studying, I’m allowed eat like a cow that hasn’t seen grass in a year. With the amount of cramming I’ve done in the week running up to exams, I deserve to drink a beer in celebration of each hour of study I do. Maybe I could just drink to each hour of study I should have done.

Depression

All is lost, I’ll never pass. It’s over! I’m definitely going to fail this exam. Oh and I’ll have no chance of passing the repeat with the concerts in Marley Park distracting me. I’ll have to drop out. My parents will hate me. I’ll never make it as anything. My life is over.

Acceptance and hope

Hang on, didn’t the lecturer say that I only need 50% in the exam to pass the module. All is not lost. I’ll try my best and sure that’s all I can do; that’s what my dad says anyway. I’m sure everyone else is in the same boat and let’s be honest, I’m young, I should be enjoying my youth. I know for definite that I won’t leave it this late to start studying at Christmas. That would be silly.

Follow Danielle on Twitter: @DaniS1006.