Satire

What To Do When You Can’t Find a Summer Job?

College is over, exams are done and you suddenly realise that you have nearly four months free time on your hands. And, then, you further realise that the whole passing the Leaving Cert and getting into college thing does nothing for you when searching for a summer job.

No matter how hard you try, that A1 in Honours Geography and a week’s Transition Year work experience in your friend’s dad’s office isn’t going to cut it to secure a job in your local Penneys.

There’s no changing the grim reality: no one wants to hire you or your works-well-under-pressure-great-time-keeper-goal-driven-team-player spiel.

So what is there to do on these long, Irish (i.e. rainy) summer days? Not a lot, sure aren’t you broke? But here’s a list that is ideal for those of us who have no income and a lot of hours to fill.

Visit the ‘big smoke’

Okay, so obviously we all know Dublin is pretty damn expensive as cities go, but there is a surprising amount of things to do that are completely free so your ticket to and from would be one of your only expenses.

You could soak up the (sparse) sunshine in St Stephen’s Green with a bit of Al Fresco dining – a deli roll or something if you’re feeling lucky. If you’re more of a thrill seeker, you can grab a Coca Cola bike and take your life into your own hands cycling around the city for the day. You get a 30-minute free rent so you could be really crafty and trade them in every 30 minutes, right?

If you’re a history buff, you can visit Glasnevin Cemetery, the final resting place of countless Irish legends, such as De Valera, Daniel O’Connell and Michael Collins himself. There’s three daily tours you can catch and it’s certainly a worthwhile trip.

There’s also free entry to a number of the capital’s museums and the Hugh Lane Art Gallery, as well as the option of just torturing yourself in the shops and looking at all things you could’ve bought if you had managed to find a summer job.

Netflix marathon

So this is of course not a new past-time if you are anything like a normal college student (by normal I mean an individual who wastes countless hours putting off doing assignments).
But think about it – you can get around to all the different series’ you wanted to watch but just couldn’t fit in, because you had already reached the infinite amount a human being can watch at one time.

And then there’s all the films you haven’t watched yet too. Personally I’ve just started Friday Night Lights and think, so far, it’s Netflix gold. In my eyes watching Texan High Schoolers play American football beats finding a summer job.

Be health-conscious

Yes. It’s an option: A nice, little get fit campaign can do wonders for filling the long days. Sure, what’s a 10k in the morning, a spot of gymnastics during the afternoon and a sparring session before bed? It could do wonders for your physical and mental well-being this summer. It could.

In all seriousness, joining a running club or any local class on the cheap is a fantastic way to meet new people, get in shape and pass a few of those hours you wouldn’t have if you could find a summer job.

And there’s always a wide range of healthy recipes and foods you could try out in the kitchen and you could finally find out what Quinoa is, which, as we know, wouldn’t really have been a possibility if you could find a summer job.

Cycle to Electric Picnic

On the topic of physical activity and getting fit and healthy, one could also train and take part in the charity cycle Tour de Picnic to Electric Picnic, in Stradbally, Co Laois. The funds you raise from sponsorship all go to charity and you get to attend the festival for free.

All you’ve got to do is put down a fifty euro deposit (which goes towards your funds raised) to secure your place and then be able to cycle from Dublin to the festival. You’d get to witness the majestic Florence and the Machine and the superb George Ezra – and sure, wouldn’t you have been working that weekend if you had managed to find a summer job.

Study for your repeats

Maybe just try, again, to find a summer job.

If a job sounds better than studying for your repeats, Havas Worldwide Dublin are looking for recently graduated and final year marketing students to join their team for the summer! For more information about the position, just click here.