Roy keane arrested after attacking own reflection

When we think of the name Roy Keane we usually think of calmness personified, a modest grace, and, a timid placid innate nature. That’s why this morning’s incident involving the former footballer came as such a shock.

The former Manchester United captain was arrested at his home after allegedly attacking his own reflection in his bedroom mirror. It is believed Keane tried to ignore the image of himself multiple times but he finally cracked when a staring competition ensued.

The gentle and grace filled softie then smashed the likeness of himself before his loving wife called police who then arrested him and took him into custody for his own safety.

Witnesses stated that Keane was shouting during his arrest and that his reflection ‘started it’ and that he was intent on ‘killing the fucking bastard’.

On another entirely unrelated note, World footballer of the year Cristiano Ronaldo has been arrested after allegedly sexually abusing his own reflection in Portugal this morning.

Credit to Galway Daily News.